Let’s all enjoy people freaking out to the Pistons winning the draft lottery

Ever since the Detroit Pistons won the NBA Draft Lottery there has excitement, sure, but it already seems to be getting drowned out by worry, consternation, frustration, paranoia. Every non-Detroit Pistons fan is coming up with some truly wild reasons why Troy Weaver should trade the pick, why he doesn’t really want the pick, why if he uses the pick it will be on everyone but Cade Cunningham.

My advice — relax. And to help with that relaxation, let’s go back to simpler times in the immediate aftermath of those first moments when we all realized Detroit won. Finally. After 51 years and the least amount of lottery luck imaginable. With Detroit Vs. Everybody and drafting failures hanging over all our heads. It was finally Detroit’s turn.

Luckily, everyone records themselves doing everything, and that includes watching ESPN on an otherwise unremarkable Tuesday evening. I assume if Detroit didn’t get the No. 1 pick most of these videos would have been forgotten in the cloud or quickly deleted. But they didn’t so they weren’t. They were shared for all the world to see. And now I share them with you.

Reaction to winning the Cade Cunningham sweepstakes seems to fall into a few categories — “Oh my god!,” “Let’s f*cking go!,” running around and/or hugging like an idiot and definitely grown men shrieking and reaching an octave previously thought unattainable.

I think I covered this in my initial post, but, frankly it’s all a blur, so I’ll retell it. I heard my wife screaming from downstairs. I was upstairs watching on a stream pre-writing my “Pistons pick four but that’s OK post.” My stream was a good 30-45 seconds behind. Screaming meant 1. The hated Cavs got the first pick 2. The cable went out 3. The Pistons won.

She wasn’t using any actual nouns. Actually, she wasn’t really using words. Just the beginning of the word “what” stretched out to 10 syllables and maybe something that sort of sounded like “I don’t believe it.”

I started screaming for confirmation one way or the other, and as none came I felt more and more like the Pistons won. I was just waiting for the feed to catch up.

I started screaming myself. and saw Big Ben hold up his index finger. No. 1 baby. Eventually, we ran and hugged each other at the top of the stairs and screamed nonsense at each other. The way only a couple who have been together for 20 years and whose bond has been forged by watching the Pistons extreme highs and extreme lows could. …

… In fact, the night I gave my wife an engagement ring, she later told me she was convinced all the hints I had been dropping was about gifting her a Tayshaun Prince jersey for Christmas, but I digress. A story for a different time.

Let’s go to the tape.

I’m going to start with my favorite, which is actually the quietest of the bunch because Will McDowell (@DetroitWilliam) was being quiet and respectful on the plane. But it’s all in the eyes. You can see the moment a franchise’s future changes in a major way.

Eye Can’t Believe it

Dwane Casey Approves

‘We Got The First Pick!’

The Pillow is My Only Friend in this Moment

The House of Pain

The Cade Cunningham Realization

Nobody Cares But Me in This Full Bar

Finger Guns?

The ‘Oh My God’

The Escape to the Real World

‘Fear the Fro, Baby!’

The ‘Let’s Gooooo!’

The Nobody Cares But Us in this Empty Bar

The Full Joker

The Shriek

Just Three Guys Hanging Out 1

Just Three Guys Hanging Out 2

Let’s F*cking Go

A Message From Above